Our BraveMoms have been so open and honest in telling us about the ways they’ve chosen to honor, remember, or celebrate their angel babies. As we commemorate Pregnancy and Infant Loss month, we wanted to share their recommendations to help other parents and families find special ways to honor the babies gone too soon.
Those who have lost a baby know there are no magic words to take the pain away and no Band-Aids to mend the broken hearts, but our hope is that these ideas may help the families of angel babies as they work through their grief.
If you have lost a child, please know that our hearts and thoughts are with you.
Select a special piece of jewelry.
A ring, necklace, or charm is a thoughtful way for families to remember an angel baby. Some moms have spoken of how meaningful it is to be able to bring a reminder with them everywhere, keeping it close to their hearts at all times. Others wear theirs only on special occasions and plan to pass it down as a family heirloom.
Choose a special tattoo.
One of the most common reasons people get tattoos is to honor or remember someone they love. The loss of a baby is no different. From angel wings to footprints to candles, these meaningful images can give grieving families a way to literally wear their hearts on their sleeves.
Join the Wave of Light.
Each year, at 7 pm local time on October 15th, people around the world light candles in memory of the babies they have lost. Everyone who participates is asked to leave his or her candle lit for an hour so that there will be a continuous wave of light around the world. Please join us that evening for a Facebook Live where we’ll discuss ways to cope with pregnancy and infant loss.
Create a memory box.
Some parents of angel babies find it helpful to hold on to items that remind them of their baby: an ultrasound photo, a special outfit or hat, a stuffed animal, a letter, or a list of possible names. A memory box like this can hold a place of honor in your home or be tucked away for safekeeping.
Find a special memento.
Whether it’s a small figurine, a garden stone, or a large sculpture, many families of angel babies have spoken about how much being able to reach out and touch something helps them heal by giving them a physical reminder that their babies were real.
Plant a tree or flower.
By planting a tree, flower, or whole garden, parents of an angel baby can create a special place to remember their child. Some moms have mentioned that nurturing these plants has allowed their hearts to begin healing when nothing else worked; other moms have noted that they feel more at ease in their remembrance gardens.
Plan an annual event or tradition.
Starting an annual tradition can help some families feel more connected to their angel babies. Some families give back to the community or join a fundraising walk; others throw birthday parties complete with cake and presents that they later donate to children in need.
Dealing with any kind of loss is difficult, but the loss of a child is particularly heartbreaking. The grieving process is unique for everyone. Some people pull away from loved ones; others surround themselves with family and friends. There are those parents who speak openly about their angel babies and those who never find the right words to express their feelings.
We’ll be holding the light for you and your angels.
- #MomLife: Finding Hope after Loss
- #MomLife: Angels and Rainbows
- Kindred Bravely on Pinterest: Pregnancy and Infant Loss
- Babble: Memorializing Your Infant after Miscarriage or Stillbirth
- Slate: “Can I Celebrate Mother’s Day?”
- BabyCenter: Coping with Pregnancy Loss